Ruth Hale

Ruth wrote these poems when undergoing treatment, at 16, for a brain tumour.

She is now 24 and doing well.

The Burst

I’ve been taking deep breaths
For years
There were never any tears
True emotions I would hide
Lock them away deep inside
So many that I burst
Anger was the first to break
Free,
From my lock and key
It said “Why me, why so long
I’m fed up of being strong”
Then guilt rushed out
And I could never understand
What that was all about,
Doubt soon reared its head
“Will you ever be the same again
Can they ever dull the pain?”
I found the answers to the questions it said
Now I’ve found hope
As I know I can cope.

The Cancer I faced

“Before you were ill..”
“Before your treatment..”
“When we didn’t know about it..”
“Before we knew..”
“When you were well..”
Why can’t you just say it?
“Before you had cancer.”

Because they care
They don’t want to distress,
Or upset.
Because it scares them,
Not me.
Because they are in denial,
That it can happen,
That it happened to me.
Cancer happened to me.

But I’ll let them avoid it,
The word, its meaning.
There’s no need for them to
Feel it,
The terror.
No need for them to face,
The cancer.
The cancer that I faced.